DEATH IS ONLY THE BEGINNING. (The Mummy, 1999)
I'M FAR FROM DONE. BUT, YASS, I DIED. I DIED A LOT IN THE PAST DECADE.
I DIED WHEN I LOST FRIENDS BECAUSE I'M GAY. I DIED WHEN I GOT REJECTED BECAUSE I'M NOT FANCY AND RICH ENOUGH. I DIED WHEN DEREK FROM ONE LITTLE INDIAN AVOIDED TO LINK MY INVITATION TO BJÖRK AFTER BEGGING HIM FOR YEARS TO MAKE THE CONNECTION AND TELL HER WHAT HER PRESENCE ON THIS PROJECT WOULD MEAN TO ME... INSTEAD LOTS OF DAZED, PITCHFORK, AND THE GUARDIAN REPETITIVE (TRUSTED?) APPEARANCES (while he linked me to old top 10s she did)... AND WITH THIS EXAMPLE... EVERYBODY ELSE NOT BELIEVING IN THE CORE OF THIS GESTURE, IN THE REASONS BEHIND MY EFFORTS... PRETENDING TO BE NOBLE, BUT ACTUALLY SUPER SHITTY IN PERSON.
Warmer Climes TURNED 10 ON AUGUST 9, 2019.
I WANT TO LOOK MORE TO THE BRIGHT SIDE. I WANT TO TRY AGAIN AND MAKE IT LOUDER. EVEN IF IT LEAVES ME IN TEARS AND IT'S SO DAMN HARD AND I'M NOT TAKING ANY DRUGS TO KEEP ME FROZEN...
IT WAS MEANT TO BE A SEMI-FAILURE FROM THE START, BECAUSE I RARELY COMPROMISED. ALL I WANTED WAS THE MUSICIANS! NAKED ON A SOUL LEVEL. WITH THEIR FULL NAMES, THEIR UNCOVERED FACES, THEIR DEEP HURTFUL / OR EXTREMELY HAPPY PERSONAL STORIES OF LIFE! REAL LIFE! RAW, UNEDITED LIFE!
IT WAS HARD AND STILL IS A MESS TO TRY AND REACH THEM AT THEIR ROOTS AND THEIR LOWEST LOWS OR HIGHEST HIGHS...
BUT FACK IT! I WON'T STOP!
I LOVE MY ARTWORKS WITH SONG LYRICS! I LOVE MY CHILD-LIKE NAIVETY IN HOW TRANSPARENT I WANT ALL THESE MUSICIANS TO BECOME FOR THIS BLOG SERIAL...
BUT LOOKING BACK!!!!!!!???????? EXACTLY 1662 MIXTAPES AND COUNTING????????? THAT'S NOT BAD AT ALL IN MY BOOK!
I WANT TO THANK YOU! THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU!
FOR DONATING FOR MY CAUSE (ESPECIALLY Control Club THAT PRACTICALLY BOUGHT MY NEW EPIC COMPUTER IN 2016! AND EVERYBODY ELSE WESTERN UNIONING ME WITH THEIR LOVE THOSE FEW TIMES THAT COUNTED AS THE BIGGEST LOVE I NEVER HAD...), FOR SHARING MY FEATURES AND GOOD WORDS ABOUT THIS WORK... TO THE PR AGENTS THAT NEVER SAID NO TO ME AND TO THE ARTISTS WHO SAW THE SPARKS IN TAKING TIME TO WRITE FOR THIS VISION!
IT WAS AND STILL FEELS LIKE THE GREATEST JOURNEY I'LL EVER BE ABLE TO CREATE AND EDIT THROUGH THIS BODY AND SOUL AND WITH MY LIFE!
THANK YOU TO ALL FOR STILL BEING STRANGELY BY MY SIDE, EVEN IF I'M LONELIER THAN I'VE EVER BEEN...
IT'S A MESSY PLANET THESE DAYS FOR ALL... IT'S A PAIN IN THE AZZ TO NOT COMPLAIN AND NOT WHINE... WHEN ALL AROUND WE LIVE WHAT WE LIVE... YEAH, YOU EVENTUALLY MAKE LOADS OF MUCH MORE MONEY THAN ME IN WESTERN WORLDS, BUT WE'RE BREATHING THE SAME STINKY OXYGEN OF DEATH AND HATRED... DOH!
THIS BLOG IS A GIFT! FROM YOU TO ME.
I GOT LOST IN A DAILY JOB THAT REDUCED IN THE PAST 3 YEARS THE BLOG WORK TO ALMOST 20%...
I ALSO GOT IRREVERSIBLY LOST IN MY GRUDGES WITH UNFAIRLY SPOILED RICH KIDS AND THEIR ACCESS TO LIFE...
I GOT HURT BY SEEING LOCAL GAYS ACTING LIKE HOMOPHOBES ONLINE AND IN REAL LIFE... "I'M THE ONLY GAY IN THE VILLAGE", Little Britain style... THIS SEPARATISM OF THEM IS KILLING ME THE MOST! IF YOU'RE NOT TOO THIN AND TOO WELL-DRESSED AND RICH ENOUGH: YOU'RE A ZERO... ZERO MY AZZ!
I ALSO GOT ETERNALLY IRREVERSIBLY BROKEN BY HOMOPHOBIC WOMEN AND THE WAYS THEY USE TO HURT #LGBTQIAplus BY BEING PART OF MOVEMENTS LIKE #METOO OR BY SIMPLY WRONGLY-EDUCATING THEIR KIDS AND THEIR HUSBANDS INTO BEING HATEFUL HOMOPHOBIC PIGS.
I GOT IRREVERSIBLY STUCK AT LOSING OLD FRIENDSHIPS AND MY BETRAYING "FRIENDS" IN THE BUCHAREST CAPITAL OF THIS SHITHOLE... STILL OBSESSING...
ALL THIS POISON... FOR SIMPLY BEING DIFFERENT AND ESPECIALLY FOR CONSTANTLY SPEAKING MY TRUTH.
NOBODY WANTS SOMEONE SCREAMING THEIR DEFECTS IN FRONT OF THEM...
DESPITE THE ANGRY MOMENTS AND THE WALLS OF IGNORANT HOMOPHOBIA AND THE IMMENSE TOWERS OF HYPOCRISY... I WANTED TO GET TO KNOW MUSICIANS BETTER AND, EVEN WITH ALL THESE BAD VIBES, I RECEIVED SUCH WELL TEXTURED CONSTELLATIONS OF EMPATHY BACK...
MAYBE THAT'S THE SOURCE IN THE CHANGE OF MY THINKING. I NEED TO LIBERATE MYSELF FROM OLD GHOSTS, ACCEPTING THAT I CAN'T RESOLVE BROKEN SHITHEADS BY REPEATING MY TRUTH TO THEM...
I FEED WITH EVERY EPISODE OF THIS BLOG.
IT'S A JOURNAL. A JOURNEY OF BETTERING OURSELVES. A REMINDER TO BE ALWAYS IN SEARCH OF THE TRUTH AND THE SOUND AND THE FEELING.
I PRESENT THE BLOG AS A MUSIC / PRO-GAY BLOG NOW.
SO IT'S NOT JUST MUSIC NOW. IT'S STRIDENTLY AND DEEPLY PRO-LGBTQIA+!!!!
THANK YOU FOR BEING HUMAN TO ME, TO THE WORLD AND TO YOUR SWEET SELVES!
LEAVE THE MASKS BEHIND AND COME WITH ME!
MAYBE IN 10 YEARS I'LL FEEL IN THE MOOD TO WRITE THAT I'M HAPPY AND AT A FINAL MOMENT WITH THIS BLOG.
MAYBE IN THE NEXT 10 YEARS I'LL FIND Warmer Climes! STILL SEARCHING... STILL LEARNING A LOT ABOUT YOU AND MYSELF...
STOP THE HATE AND LOOK IN THE MIRROR!
BRIGHTER YEARS TO MYSELF AND TO ALL OF YOU KIND SOULS!!!!!!!
